Friday, April 23, 2010

A Modest Proposal

This story has been going around the internet for a little bit. Basically, an Iranian cleric, Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi, blamed a loss of morals and immodestly dressed women for causing earthquakes. As a small aside, this is not the first time a religious leader has blamed a natural disaster on society's loss of morals.

A woman on Facebook decided to test his theory. This got quickly out of hand, and her Boobquake Facebook event now has over 40,000 attendees.

With all of that said, I think this is a wonderful idea. In fact, I say we put the Boobquake Hypothesis through a proper scientific experiment. We can put the question of immodestly dressed women causing seismic activity to the test. With the proper experimetnal set up, I think we might even be able to get USGS funding for our research.

Unfortunately, Sedighi was a little short on information in exactly what was considered an immodesty induced quake. For example, how long of a lead time is needed for a boobquake or whether or not the epicenter would be centered in the vicinity of the cleavage. Like the flapping of a butterfly's wings causing a hurricane on the other side of the world, could scantily clad American woman be responsible for last weekend's earthquake in China? To control for this cleavage effect, I propose collecting global seismic activity for a month between experimental groups.

I suggest 3 data groups, a control group and 2 experimental groups. First, the control. That should be fairly easy; just dress normally. This will give us our starting baseline.

Now we're ready for our experimental groups. Let's take the modestly dressed group first. In order to provide proper skin coverage, I'm thinking proper Victorian dress with long sleeves, high collared shirts and about 10 petty coats. On second thought, perhaps we should all just wear loose fitting sweat suits, to kill any sexiness or fetish factor.

Next up is the real test, immodestly dressed ladies. Everyone break out your club wear. Short skirts and boob shirts for everyone. Maybe some pvc catsuits for variety. Groups such as FEMA and the Red Cross should be notified and standing by during this part of the experiment, in order to provide emergency response to areas hit by the quakes.

And just to cover all of our bases, we should throw in some experimental groups to test the guys, too. After all, all these earthquakes might actually be the result of Taylor Lautner's exposed pectorals.

6 comments:

creditos fovissste said...

Excellent post. Thnak you for good articles and good informations i follow blogs you too.

creditos fovissste said...

Excellent post. Thnak you for good articles and good informations i follow blogs you too.

board shorts ed hardy said...

You bookmarks also get indexed right away in yahoo!

pamod negi said...

Great blog- really enjoyed reading it. Have bookmarked you and will check back regular. Please feel free to take a look at my blog...
Cheap Flighs to Nairobi
Flights to Nairobi
Nairobi Flights

franklin said...

The "pane of glass" image also helps your backswing. If you swing the club too much Asics Onitsuka Tiger Shoes to the outside during the initial part of your back swing, you will break the pane of glass. By keeping Hogan's image in your mind as you start your < align="left">Belstaff backswing your arms will stay connected to your body - you are almost forced to swing the club on plane!
Motorcycle Fairings The wrists will cock by themselves without you giving them any thought.
Louis Vuitton Handbags

lin741852 said...

sac burberry
sac chanel
chaussures nike
porte cles chanel
bracelet louis vuitton
chaussures puma
portefeuille louis vuitton
chaussures louis vuitton
sac a main
chaussures Christian Louboutin
dolce gabbana tasche
ed hardy tasche
fendi tasche
tee-shirts louis vuitton
louis vuitton pas cher
sac juicy
sac guess 2012 soldes
sac guess pas cher
tee shirts prada
tee shirts louis vuitton
prada bolsas
versace bolsas
Christian Louboutin Soldes
Christian Louboutin 2012
sandales Christian Louboutin
Christian Louboutin pas cher
chaussures Christian Louboutin
sac louis vuitton 2012
louis vuitton soldes